sunshine

Yesterday, the sun came out for the first time in a looong time.  The minute it peeked through, we bundled up Eleanor and shot out of the house.  The sunshine is so fleeting here.  One minute it's out, and the next minute it will disappear - for weeks.  So you better not mess around with getting out of the house.

We strolled around Gruneburg Park and soaked up some much-needed vitamin D.  Believe it or not, we have to give Ellie vitamin D supplements because she sees so little sun.  Poor girl.  It's hard for her California-girl mama to comprehend.  Oh well, at least she looks darling in her winter hats.

munchkin

It's been too long since I posted.  What can I tell you?  We're super busy with bath times and stories, finger puppets and naps.  Days pass without the slightest inkling of the time that's slipped by us.  And when I stop and look at photos of the girl, I realize just how much she's changed in the past 12 weeks. Twelve funny, beautiful, sleepless, life-changing, frustrating, unbelievably amazing weeks.

utterly smitten

...with my two loves this Valentine's Day.  Eleanor and her daddy surprised me with this sweet necklace from Lisa Leonard Designs on Valentine's Day morning.  They were so sneaky!  There was a delicious pot of coffee and a plate of sweet treats waiting for me alongside the beautifully wrapped gift.  Eleanor's daddy is doing such a great job of teaching her how to melt her mama's heart!

being someone's mama

Pregnancy is the ultimate act of letting go.  Nothing is yours anymore.  It takes you over - mind, spirit and body.  And you believe when your baby arrives, you will go back to who you were before.  It is only once the blur of the first few weeks has given way to a bit of clarity, and you have a moment to think, that you realize you aren't you anymore.  And you look back and realize that you crossed a one-way bridge, and you are standing on a different shore.  You are here now.  You will never be there again.  This new patch of earth is beautiful, but oh so different from where you came.  Your sweet baby will never know who you were before she was here.  To her, you will always be the woman on this shore.

It's bittersweet - this new journey of being someone's mama.

two months

Dear Eleanor Jane,

On Thursday, you turned two months old. Congratulations! Your daddy and I sat and exclaimed about how much you have grown and changed. There are times we can hardly remember how tiny you were just a few short weeks ago. Sometimes we can see you growing while you sleep. Really, I'm not kidding. There are days when an outfit you wore not just three days before doesn't fit, and you look at me like, "um, I would really like to be able to extend my legs. Kinda important for all that kicking I like to do." Seriously, you've gotta give me a break kid. I'm still wearing clothes I went to high school in - this overnight growth spurt stuff takes some getting used to.

You are also no longer terrified of yawning. Some day when you read this, you will look at me and give me one of those annoying teenage looks and say, "really? yawning? I was afraid of yawning?" Yes, you were. And it was hysterical. At first we felt really terrible for you, poor baby, but then it got funny. And we laughed. In fact, I'm kind of sad you figured out it's okay now. I know, I know...BAD Mama.

And have I mentioned how strong you are? You've been holding up your head since day one - an accomplishment noticed by everyone who holds you. I think it's because you're so curious. You are adamant about seeing everything around you with those bright eyes. You love it when we walk around the house so you can see things. I can't believe you aren't tired of looking at the same stuff all the time. I know I am. But it is cute. If only you would let me sit down once in a while, life would be perfect.

But oh, the smiles! They are the reason I stumble from bed with you each morning. Once we reach the changing table, I'm rewarded with the most fantastic smiles. I'm not sure why the changing table is such a magical spot, but I'm not complaining. I could spend hours changing your diapers - um, actually, I do spend hours changing your diapers. You make sure of that.

The past two months have been unbelievable. From sleepy, 2:00 am feedings to toothless grins. You arrived and turned our world completely upside-down. And for the life of me, I can't seem to remember what we did with ourselves before you came.

holding tight

afternoon sun on a snowy winter day + warm breastmilk from your mama =  one sleepy baby

Since we get so little sunshine here during the winter (or summer, for that matter), Eleanor doesn't get much sunshine.  So when the sun does make a blessed appearance, we crank up the radiator in the office and strip her down to a diaper to catch as many rays as possible.  Then we pinch chubby thighs and sigh over dimpled knees.  Such a glorious way to spend an afternoon!